No-Maaahhhr!

1B: Morneau

2B: Tolbert

3B: Harris

SS: Punto

RF: Cuddyer

CF: Span

LF: Young

Ca: Mauer

PITCHING:

   Blackburn

   Guerrier

   Nathan

TOP O’ THE FIRST:

Looks like Crede’s hand is still all messed and he won't be playing.

Punto gets a piece of a throw by Mauer to stop a runner from stealing 2^nd.  Guy still stole it, after being nailed and Punto getting a piece of the ricochet.

Youkilis is up.  I’m scared of his beard.  He is also dripping what I believe is sweat all over the place, even though it’s the start of the game.

BOTTOM O’ THE FIRST:

Mauer is up.  Lookin’ pretty, Dreamyburns.  Line drive goes to Pedroia and a double play results.  2 outs.

Morneau gets a hit, goes for second while the infielders chase after the ball, but is tagged out.  

TOP O’ THE SECOND:

Not really sure what happened this inning, other than me running to grab some Windex to clean my laptop screen … and then ending up ramming my shin on a stair after tripping on air and consequently ramming my knee and slamming my head off the wall.  BUT HEY, THE SAWX DIDN’T SCORE!

BOTTOM O’ THE SECOND:

Still 0-0, and Cuddyer leads off.  Let’s talk about Cuddy for a second:  you, sir, have become badass.  Granted he was disabled like all of last year, but I’d say its sort of out of the blue that he’s suddenly the right-handed Mauer.  Leadoff double with a line drive to deep left.

Kubel follows Cuddyer.  Kubes hits a sacrifice, which moves Cuddyer to third.

Crede did end up having x-rays on his hand, but apparently didn’t break anything.  He can’t grip a bat, so he had to skip batting practice today.

Deltron 3000 Young is up.  Sadly, his mother just died and Burt said he’s been having a rough time playing since. 

TOP O’ THE THIRD:

After three caught fly outs, the Sawx have another scoreless inning.

BOTTOM O’ THE THIRD:

Tolbert, aka NEW FISH, is up.  This guy has a better batting average than Punto, which makes me sad.  The Dirt McGirt Punto better make it rain, or he’s gonna be gone soon.  And he’s thrown out at first.

Span is apparently “feeling woozy,” according to Dick.  Takes a pitch to the ribs and chucks his bat.  Steals second.

TOP O’ THE FOURTH:

Deltron makes a sick catch of a line drive out in left.  Another scoreless inning!

[Boring chunk of game, busy icing my shin]

BOTTOM O’ THE FIFTH:

With Tolbert and Harris on 1 and 2, Punto gets a nice hit and sends Harris across home plate, with Punto on 2 and Tolbert on 3.  1-1.

Span is out at first, but hits in Tolbert, making it 2-1.  NICE.

Mauer is walked, Punto still on third, and Morneau is up.  MORNEAU HITS A THREE-RUN HOMER!  Good Lord, the Twins better pay Mauer and Morneau in Aztec gold to keep them around.  5-1.

What was with the “Touch A Ball, Morneau” sign??  HAHHA!  The camera was on it and then cut away really quickly.  I totally thought Burt would say something inappropriate AND HILARIOUS.

TOP O’ THE SIXTH:

Boring.

BOTTOM O’ THE SIXTH:

Is it wrong to think Blackburn is quite the looker?  Perhaps I have a thing for sideburns.

Three outs, and its still 5-1.

TOP O’ THE SEVENTH:

Guerrier and um someone else are warming up in the bullpen.  Looks like Blackburn is doing fairly well still, though.

Sawx get one run, 5-2.

BOTTOM O’ THE SEVENTH:

Blackburn had 111 pitches and is done for the game.  Foxy.

Punto charged with his fourth error.  Up at bat, he hits a nice one into center and makes a beautiful slide into 2.  Span sacrifices with a bunt to get Punto to 3.

Mauer strikes out, the second time in this game.  Ew.

Oh, intentionally walking Morneau?  SAWX, YOU SCURRRED?

Aw, shit.  Cuddyer pops one up with two outs and it’s over.

TOP O’ THE EIGHTH:

Guerrier, the French Warrior, is pitching.  Youkilis hits a huge, but nevertheless out, one in the stands.

A foul tip nails Mauer in the shoulder, but he seems to be still alright to play, and the crowd loves it.  Youkilis, The Beard, is struck out.

BOTTOM O’ THE EIGHTH:

Harris is nailed by the Sawx pitcher.  Much like the Brewer game on Sunday, that’s the second player to be beaned tonight.

TOP O’ THE NINTH:

Nathan is pitching.  Horse puff count: 1, although I probably missed a few.

Two out, one on 1.  Gomez chases a huge hit to center and catches it, ending the game.

FINAL: 5-2, Twins.

VERDICT:  Pretty damn good.  Our pitching held it together, and other than some small errors, we fielded well.  Morneau had that sick three-run homer, and Punto had some redeemingly good hits, too.